Laughter is the Best Medicine

Greetings friends and strangers! Tonight, I am going to embark on a journey of happiness. For those that know me, you are probably thinking, "Who is this and what have you done with Brandon!?" Well sometimes, even when you feel like curling up into a ball in some hole in the woods, you have to count your blessings. That's one good way out of that hole. Anyhow, back to happiness. This weekend was pretty nice. I had the opportunity to spend time with some dear old friends, and to hopefully make some new friends. To have people you can call friends is pretty special. There are many people that go throughout life that either don't have time for friends, or are too concerned with getting ahead in life, therefore walking all over people that might otherwise be friends. I won't even get into the people that are too strange to have friends, this might divert us from the journey. I am fortunate to have people that overlook my bad qualities (and there are many) and accept me for who I am. I am not saying I don't try to change those bad traits, my friends are just patient while I am working those things out. Heck, I have a few friends that has been patient with me as long as I can remember, even if I have been working on not being a blunt jerk for that entire time. (Believe it or not, it's gotten better.)

It was a nice variety of settings that our interactions took place. One night it was with good wine (or in my case, beer) and good food around a fire the next night it was at a giant round table in a restaurant, also with good beer and good food. Another common thread was laughter. To put it simply, laughing is pretty great. It seems that for that period of time when you are laughing with friends, all the troubles that we all battle in the daily rat race take a back seat. I believe this can have a healing affect. I'm no doctor, but if your blood pressure goes down, and even for a short time you can just relax instead of being so blasted tense, that has to be good for you. So, my prescription for life is laughing with friends. Do take with alcohol. Will not cause drowsiness. Take on a full stomach. Please take as directed.

"Send a Janitor on Vacation Foundation"

In an effort to get myself out of Stinkin' Lincoln, I have started down a path never travelled by myself. EBay! Oh sure I've purchased many items on EBay. According to my "Feedback Score", I have purchased 28 different items over the last several years. Usually concert tickets and the occasional janitorial supply. But now I have taken on the selling aspect of EBay. And you know what, it's kind of fun. My wife told me that if I sell all the things I have been tucking away like the pack rat I am, I can use the money towards my trip south of the border.

The first item I sold was my scuba regulator. Though the goal with that was to upgrade to a better scuba regulator, I couldn't believe the "high" that I got when I received the email that informed me that my regulator had sold. Next thing you know I am going through boxes in the attic, boxes in the basement, and boxes in the garage to find things that I may be able to sell. (In case you haven't figured it out, I have what they call an addictive personality.) Over the past week or so I have put approximately 15 items on EBay to try and sell, of which, half have sold already. What really blows me away, is usually when I get into something like this, my lovely wife gets frustrated because she feels, and is probably right, that I am wasting time. But here are two things that drive my wife crazy:

1) Clutter

2) A Tight Budget

So for her, my new found obsession is awesome. Much of the junk, i.e., clutter, that has been building up around here is slowly be sent off to various parts of the country. Then the trip that I am going on in a month or so was going to make the budget a little tight. But now, I am raising my own capital to use as spending money in Mexico. Yep, she is a happy camper. The only problem is I am starting to run out of things to sell. That's where this story takes an unfortunate turn for my bride of nearly 14 years. You see, my wife's sister and brother-in-law are in town. They recently moved out of Stinkin' Lincoln and perhaps went to one of the few places that is worse than here, Stinkin' Bowman, North Dakota. Anyhow, since they are back in town, they are picking up the last of their belonging that are still here. The brother-in-law, who is one of the most generous people I have ever met, sees the fun I am having selling things on EBay and decides to make a few donations to, what I call the "Send a Janitor on a Vacation Foundation". (I wanted to call it the "Send a Janitor to Mexico Foundation", but with all the Hispanics that are in cleaning, I didn't want it to sound like a political statement.) At first he just gave me some tools he had that were pretty old, or as we like to say in the EBay selling biz, "vintage". But then it got a little out of hand. The brother-in-law heads to the grocery store and to just grab a couple things for their trip back to North Dakota tomorrow. After a while, my wife, her sister and myself are all wondering where Joe is. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent, as well as the guilty.) My sister-in-law calls him up and he says, I'm in the middle of something, I will call you back. I say to my sister-in-law, he must be getting you a present or maybe some flowers. But boy was I wrong. He was getting me something instead. On his journey to store, he spotted a yard sale that was a "ONE DAY ONLY EVENT!", so he had to stop. He looks around and quickly spots a couple large boxes of trading cards. He tells the guy he will take them all. The guy says, "I have two more boxes in the house," and Joe says he'll take them. So, imagine my wife's expression when Joe walks in with a 4 boxes of trading cards. Baseball, football, NASCAR, even some Batman and 007.

Needless to say, I appreciate the donation. However, I have to move things fast before my wife's head explodes. The problem is, everybody and their mother has baseball cards on EBay. There was a time when it was a popular and booming business. Not so much anymore. Cards that were worth $15-20 back when I collected in the 80's and early 90's are worth $8. That wasn't the direction we saw that going back then. For once I made a wise decision and sold the cards when they were worth something. So, I think I am going to have to get creative. Maybe sell them by team, or something like that. All I know is the approximately 30,000 cards have got to go somewhere, they just can't stay here.

Spring Has Sprung

As I was pulling up to the neighborhood coffee shop, I noticed there were no parking spots near the popular coffee emporium. I drove about half a block down, parked and hopped out of the truck into the delightful warm sun. As I walked to the coffee house, in my shorts and t-shirt, I was reminded of a few short weeks ago when the same thing happened. Only then it was about 14 degrees, I had my winter coat on, and flannel lined jeans. I thought to myself, "It's funny how you don't mind parking a little ways away when the weather is nice."

A couple days after the trip to the coffee shop, I had some things I needed to do around the house. After running up stairs and downs stairs for a while I started noticing how warm it was getting in the house. I figured the thermostat must have been set too high. But to my surprise the heat wasn't on, yet it was 76 degrees in the house. I needed some things out in my garage, which detached from the house. I stepped out and I couldn't believe hot warm it was. I checked the thermometer and it said 85! I thought to myself, "So that's why it's so hot in the house!". Next thing you know I am greeted by two slobbering, panting, and hot English Mastiffs. I noticed their massive water bowls were all but empty, aside from a thick gelatinous liquid that most definitely was not water. I then empty the Mastiff goo out of the water bowls and refilled them. The dogs greedily lapped up the water in nothing flat. I headed to the garage to get what I needed and as I approach the dogs, they both are still looking quite hot. So, I grabbed a rag to wipe off their dripping faces, and asked them if they wanted to come in. Usually at that point they will either come in if they want to, or stay outside if they don't. When I asked them, they just both plopped down in the sun, and one even rolled over on her back. Even the dogs are happy winter is over.

Today I was driving around a bit, and I noticed a Magnolia tree was starting to blossom. Seeing that made me what to jump up and down, but I was driving so I thought it was better that I didn't. A few blocks down, a tree is starting to get it's leaves. As I continued on I see a Maple tree budding out. Then I get home and notice how green our grass is getting. I looked beside the garage where I planted Vinca Minor last year and the plants had hundreds of little flowers about to bloom.

Oh my goodness! It happened! The winter from a frozen over hell has ended. The scientist said it had to happen but I was starting to doubt them. The worst winter I can ever remember is done, and spring has sprung. (I'm a poet, and didn't knowit.) Yippy!!!