"Send a Janitor on Vacation Foundation"

In an effort to get myself out of Stinkin' Lincoln, I have started down a path never travelled by myself. EBay! Oh sure I've purchased many items on EBay. According to my "Feedback Score", I have purchased 28 different items over the last several years. Usually concert tickets and the occasional janitorial supply. But now I have taken on the selling aspect of EBay. And you know what, it's kind of fun. My wife told me that if I sell all the things I have been tucking away like the pack rat I am, I can use the money towards my trip south of the border.

The first item I sold was my scuba regulator. Though the goal with that was to upgrade to a better scuba regulator, I couldn't believe the "high" that I got when I received the email that informed me that my regulator had sold. Next thing you know I am going through boxes in the attic, boxes in the basement, and boxes in the garage to find things that I may be able to sell. (In case you haven't figured it out, I have what they call an addictive personality.) Over the past week or so I have put approximately 15 items on EBay to try and sell, of which, half have sold already. What really blows me away, is usually when I get into something like this, my lovely wife gets frustrated because she feels, and is probably right, that I am wasting time. But here are two things that drive my wife crazy:

1) Clutter

2) A Tight Budget

So for her, my new found obsession is awesome. Much of the junk, i.e., clutter, that has been building up around here is slowly be sent off to various parts of the country. Then the trip that I am going on in a month or so was going to make the budget a little tight. But now, I am raising my own capital to use as spending money in Mexico. Yep, she is a happy camper. The only problem is I am starting to run out of things to sell. That's where this story takes an unfortunate turn for my bride of nearly 14 years. You see, my wife's sister and brother-in-law are in town. They recently moved out of Stinkin' Lincoln and perhaps went to one of the few places that is worse than here, Stinkin' Bowman, North Dakota. Anyhow, since they are back in town, they are picking up the last of their belonging that are still here. The brother-in-law, who is one of the most generous people I have ever met, sees the fun I am having selling things on EBay and decides to make a few donations to, what I call the "Send a Janitor on a Vacation Foundation". (I wanted to call it the "Send a Janitor to Mexico Foundation", but with all the Hispanics that are in cleaning, I didn't want it to sound like a political statement.) At first he just gave me some tools he had that were pretty old, or as we like to say in the EBay selling biz, "vintage". But then it got a little out of hand. The brother-in-law heads to the grocery store and to just grab a couple things for their trip back to North Dakota tomorrow. After a while, my wife, her sister and myself are all wondering where Joe is. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent, as well as the guilty.) My sister-in-law calls him up and he says, I'm in the middle of something, I will call you back. I say to my sister-in-law, he must be getting you a present or maybe some flowers. But boy was I wrong. He was getting me something instead. On his journey to store, he spotted a yard sale that was a "ONE DAY ONLY EVENT!", so he had to stop. He looks around and quickly spots a couple large boxes of trading cards. He tells the guy he will take them all. The guy says, "I have two more boxes in the house," and Joe says he'll take them. So, imagine my wife's expression when Joe walks in with a 4 boxes of trading cards. Baseball, football, NASCAR, even some Batman and 007.

Needless to say, I appreciate the donation. However, I have to move things fast before my wife's head explodes. The problem is, everybody and their mother has baseball cards on EBay. There was a time when it was a popular and booming business. Not so much anymore. Cards that were worth $15-20 back when I collected in the 80's and early 90's are worth $8. That wasn't the direction we saw that going back then. For once I made a wise decision and sold the cards when they were worth something. So, I think I am going to have to get creative. Maybe sell them by team, or something like that. All I know is the approximately 30,000 cards have got to go somewhere, they just can't stay here.